When women come together to heal, rediscover

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Rebuild With Estherin began as a small women-only community inspired by Esthrine Wong’s personal journey but has since grown into a space for women to connect, heal and rediscover themselves.

Founded by Wong, the community brings together women from different backgrounds, including students, mothers and working women, with activities centred on wellness, fitness and simple social gatherings.

In this interview with Sarawak Tribune, she shares how Rebuild began, why she chose to make it a women-only space, and how her own journey continues to shape the community.

SARAWAK TRIBUNE: Rebuild initially focused on mothers. Why was this important to you, and what have you noticed about the women who have joined the community?

Wong: When I started, it was really for mothers. But as I continued, I realised other women, including students and introverts, were joining, so I opened it to all women. For me, mothers especially need a space where they can be themselves. Sometimes they don’t have friends or don’t know how to find friends. For example, maybe they feel that their friends are very wealthy and they cannot fit into that circle.

Rebuild becomes their comfort zone, where they can slowly step out. That is what I’m building right now. It’s not just my community. Rebuild belongs to all the women. It is built from their spirit, especially the mothers. Others who joined, most of them are in their 20s and 30s. I was actually surprised that women in their 20s would join because they are looking for friends, but they don’t necessarily like the circle they already have. Some are students and very introverted. They may be used to studying or spending time on the Internet, but they don’t know how to approach people and say, ‘Let’s go hiking, let’s go camping.’ Our youngest participant is 16, and we also have Russian, Chinese, Dayak and Malay women.

Because we come from different backgrounds, we learn from one another. There is a Russian woman who joined because her husband works in Sarawak and she has few friends. So, Rebuild gives people a comfort zone where they can step out and meet others.

What activities have you started so far and what do you hope to introduce next?

For now, we have brisk walking, but because of the haze, our hiking activities have stopped for a while. So, I was thinking, ‘What can we do?’ Then I thought we could have workshops. I recently collaborated with a flower shop, and we are discussing a bouquet-making activity. I am trying to introduce more affordable activities so women can join. I looked at similar events, and some can cost RM178 or even RM300 and above. So, if I can create something that costs less, more women can participate.

At one point, you almost gave up on Rebuild. What made you decide to continue?

About two weeks ago, when I went hiking with my girls, I openly told them, ‘I want to give up with Rebuild.’ Then, I wondered whether I should change Rebuild and open it to everyone. But the girls told me, ‘Don’t. You do it like this. It is good because we want a comfort space, especially Malay women.’ If the space is mixed with men, some of them don’t want to join. I really appreciated that they gave me those ideas. I told myself, ‘Okay, I will do it, and I will do it big.’ So, I continue doing it until now.

“Rebuild” carries a deeper meaning for you. Before Rebuild, you were already leading a team. What did that experience teach you about leadership and culture, and how did it eventually lead to Rebuild?

Before Rebuild, I was already leading my own team, and I learned a lot about leadership, especially about culture. For me, when you build a team, the leader has a big influence on its culture. If the leader has a good mindset, the team can compete in a healthy way, share knowledge and help one another. What I also learned was that a team should not be built around one person.

With my team, the members themselves created the identity because they felt connected to it. I listened to them, and that taught me that when people are given a voice, they will also help build the culture. That experience made me realise that being a leader is not just about having your own product or telling people what to do. It is about knowing how to bring people together and build something with them.

After everything I learned from my team, my clients and my own life, I started thinking, ‘Do I really want to create another product and sell another product?’ I realised that was not what I wanted. I wanted to build my own community. That is how Rebuild came about. It came from the culture I learned from my team, the things I learned from my clients and everything I had experienced in my own life. In Chinese, we call it 重建 (Chóngjiàn), which means rebuilding yourself. For me, when you are not a mother, not someone’s girlfriend, wife or daughter, who are you? You need to find yourself along the way. That is Rebuild: ‘We move, we heal, we rediscover.’ Sometimes, you need to break down to break through.

How did your own life experience influence the community you are building today?

Before Rebuild, I would say I was still finding my way. At the same time, I was doing e-commerce and selling slimming products. But when I followed up with my customers, I realised I enjoyed teaching them more.

Instead of asking them to keep buying products, I taught them how to have proper meals, understand things like insulin spikes and make healthier choices. I would show them that healthy food does not have to be expensive. Even something as simple as nasi campur can be a healthy meal if you know how to choose your food.

I really enjoyed doing that, and although my income grew more slowly, I found that my customers stayed with me for a long time. That made me realise that my purpose was not just about selling products. I wanted to use what I had learned to inspire and help people through my own experience.

How did your own personal journey shape your decision to initially focus on mothers and build Rebuild?

My own weight-loss journey also made me understand why I wanted to focus on mothers. I went through a difficult period after losing my first husband in an accident. I gained weight and reached 92kg, struggled with my finances and went through a court case.

That period became a turning point because I realised I needed to make changes in my life, especially for my daughter. I asked myself, ‘My daughter has already lost one father, so how could I do this to her?’ That was when my weight-loss journey really started. I began making changes step by step, including distancing myself from old habits and learning how to take care of my health. It was not an easy journey, and I had to learn many things on my own.

Later, when I went through another major change in my life, it took me time to reset my mindset and get myself back on track. Those experiences helped me understand that many women, especially mothers, may also be going through things that people do not see or talk about. I learned everything the hard way, so I want to have a platform where my story can inspire others. That is how Rebuild came about. But it is not only my story.

The stories of the women who join will also become part of Rebuild. That is also why I want to start a podcast and storytelling channel. I want to create a platform where women can share their experiences, because sometimes one person’s story can help another woman realise that she is not alone.

You mentioned wanting to start a podcast and storytelling channel. How do you hope these platforms, together with the activities within Rebuild, can give women more opportunities to share their stories, voices and ideas?

I want to start a podcast because there are a lot of stories to tell. I’m waiting for my microphone, and after that, I’ll start. For now, it will be called Rebuild with Estherin. I want to start slowly and simply because I don’t have a crew yet. If we eventually have a video editor and more people helping, then we can do more.

I also believe in keeping things simple. Every time we organise an activity, there are always one or two women who are very involved, and maybe they can eventually become leaders within Rebuild. I also encourage students to organise activities they enjoy. One student suggested having a cooking class, and when I asked what she wanted to cook, she said, ‘Maggi!’ I said, ‘Okay, why not?’ We can even create something fun and creative with Maggi. It does not have to be complicated. Sometimes, it is simply about gathering together.

I believe Rebuild can be sustainable because the women themselves believe in the community and the system we are building. I also want to give more exposure to their voices and share what they are doing.

With the community growing, how do you see Rebuild developing in the future?

As I said, I believe Rebuild can be sustainable for the long term. Eventually, I would like to expand Rebuild beyond Kuching, but not now. But if we want to expand outside Kuching, we need a system and people to manage it. So, maybe we start here first. If there are women in places like Bintulu who have the same idea, we can build it together.

In other words it needs a proper system and people who are willing to manage it and share the same passion. Rebuild is not mine. It belongs to all the women. It has grown from the spirit and participation of the women in the community, especially the mothers.

How do you hope Rebuild can support women who may be struggling emotionally or socially?

I’ve been through anxiety and depression, so when women come to me, I tell them, ‘It’s fine. You can trust me.’ I’m not just saying it. I’ve been through it myself. I also used to not believe in therapy or counselling, but eventually I went.

I realised there is a system and a formula to understand anxiety, overthinking and even how to communicate with your husband, partner or team members. You also learn how your mind, body and soul connect, and how to manage your own energy. You can get energy from studying, exercise or Mother Nature. Go hiking or brisk walking and you get that energy. I feel there is no one teaching us these things, and that is one of the messages I want to share.

What is the one message you want women to take away from Rebuild?

If your story can change one life, even just one life, I think you need to share it loudly, even louder. That is my perception. I used to care about the numbers — how many people viewed my Reels or followed me. Sometimes I only got 200 or 500 views, and I would ask myself, ‘How?’ But now I don’t care about the numbers. When I stopped caring, I found that the followers I have are genuine. I want women to know that they don’t need to stress about the numbers. The real ones will come.

For me, every day is a blessing. Life is full of abundance when you see it that way. You need to have gratitude and feel blessed. I believe Rebuild can go long-term because it came from my life story, but it is not only my story. The women’s stories will become part of Rebuild too.